Tonic
by LostInTheDreams
Summary: This world is a hard place to live in. The mistakes of the past are repeated, equality is something bought, and no one cares what happens to those without a voice. There is one law above all others. Only the strong survive. Maybe it's time to change the world.
**AN:** While the names are ones I made up, these _are_ Gosho's characters (Well, the important ones are. I did have to make up others). If you make it to the end, it will all make sense. I had wanted to finish this years ago and never got around to it until now. Enjoy.

* * *

 **Tonic**

 **...**

 _"A person has done evil, so another person, or a group of people, in order to fight this evil, cannot think of anything better than to create another evil, which they call punishment"  
\- Leo Tolstroy_

 **...**

Jun was bored. He was usually bored but today was even worse. Everything was so tedious these days. His mother pissed him off the most but she was avoidable if he wanted to. She didn't live with them anymore His father- was his father.

He hated the man, though he never showed it. Jun never showed when anything got him angry. It could only be used against him. His father had come into his life three year ago, when a conscience he never knew the man had attacked him and forced him back to the woman and son he had left. Jun didn't mind- at least not until his mother left soon after with him caught in-between. He would have left too if he could. He still wanted to leave. He hated this place, hated these people.

"Junsuke-kun?" Jun looked over at that little chubby kid with the black, flared up hair. He was still in middle school. They shouldn't be talking to each other. Middle schoolers didn't talk to high schoolers. Toishio was the only exception.

He was like a magnet for bullies. Jun could see why. Toishio was short for his age and the weight he had on him was no small oversight. The only reason he spoke to the kid himself was that Toishio gave him reasons to fight, reasons that let him ignore everything else and punch someone's face in that deserved it – something that wouldn't get him in too much trouble.

Of course though, he wasn't doing it for the kid, he was doing it just so he wouldn't get thrown out of school again. He was sick of the government and police getting in his business. This way they stayed away. Self-defense was a whole other matter.

Jun didn't always win. In fact, a lot of the times he lost. He was Toshiro's opposite, tall and slender, which didn't make for a very good fighter. He tried and tried but speed couldn't make up for weight. Not yet at least. And he wasn't going to get fat just to win a fight.

"What do you want?"

The heavier kid shrugged. "Nothing. You just… you help me a lot, and you always seem to be off by yourself."

Jun looked at him with bored, steel colored eyes. "I like it by myself."

Toishio moved around nervously. "Then why? Why do you help me all the time and never talk to me?"

"Because that's who I am. Deal." Jun went back to overseeing the others that were still running around before school started. He hoped someone would get in a fight today. Maybe that would lighten his boredom.

"… okay." Toishio walked off a little before turning back to him and just stopping and standing there. Jun looked at him like the kid was an idiot. He was, really. There was a difference between having poor grades and being stupid. Toishio was stupid. He didn't know what his grades looked like in class but outside of it, he was well below average. Jun knew if he tried himself, he'd be one of the top students in the school. As if he wanted that. He knew he didn't fall into the later category.

"Did you want something else?"

Toishio shook his head vigorously. "No, but I wish you would talk to me. I feel bad… when you go home with those bruises. All I can do it run away."

Jun let out a breath. He hated children. "It is my prerogative. You could be anyone. I don't want to make a friend out of you. In fact, you won't see anything more of me if you _don't_ keep playing the victim."

"Well… I'm not going anywhere. Even if you _do_ stop sticking up for me. I like you, and I don't like you getting hurt. If you're going to do it anyway, even when I'm not the reason, I guess I'll just have to be there to make sure you're alright after."

Jun thought that was a pretty strange response. The fat kid smiling at him as if he'd just accomplished something made it all the more stranger. Jun wasn't going to worry too much about it though. It was too bothersome.

"Do what you want, I don't care, just don't get in my way."

…

Toishio's job was harder than he thought. He didn't have any friends to go with after school, so he didn't mind sneaking along after Junsuke. He didn't know how the high schooler got into so many fights. When it was defending him, it was on the schoolyard, during lunch. Maybe people picked on him once or twice a week.

He watched the sixteen year old take on three or more people most of the time, either his age or older. When they left, Junsuke was often on the ground and picking himself up only after the others weren't around.

Toishio took to carrying bandages with him, cleaning and covering up scratches and cuts that were made, an icepack that Junsuke never used for long for the bruises.

He didn't expect, two weeks later, to be going late one night to get noodles and eggs for the next morning and coming across Junsuke half hidden in a dark alley with blood running from his head.

Toishio almost dropped the items, carefully putting it down before going over to the boy that had a good five years on him. He didn't care right now, pushing Junsuke's light hair that contrasted so badly with everyone else's, to the side. It was hard to see the wound, and he had nothing on him, but what worried him more was his friend barely moved after he touched him.

"Hey! … Hey! Wake up!"

Toishio let out a shaky breath when Junsuke moaned, moving a hand to his head and staining it with his own blood. "How long was I out?"

"How- how- What happened? How'd you get here? Did you see who did it?"

Junsuke just looked at his fingers, rubbing them together to see the blood there before wiping it on his pants and then rubbing his mostly clean hand across is face. "Don't worry about it. I must have gotten cut on a bottle or something."

"How can I not worry? What were you doing out this late? I mean, I am too so I guess that doesn't mean much, but-"

"Shut up. Please, shut up. My head's already bleeding, I don't need your whining to finish me off."

Toishio shut up, but he still wanted to know what had happened. Glancing down at the ground for a moment, he sat with his friend in the darkness as Junsuke composed himself.

"So…"

"So what?" The older teen slowly stood, fixing his shorts only because they'd started to fall down a bit. He was not about to walk around half showing his boxers. The guys must have really knocked him one if he'd fallen like that. "Go home."

"But I want to-"

Junsuke smacked Toshio's hand away when he went to grab onto his shirt. "Go home."

Defeated, Toishio went back to his plastic bag and slunk off into the night. He wasn't about to give up though. The second he was out of sight, he followed Junsuke wherever he was going. He didn't know why, he could do nothing to help, but something drew him to the other stronger than most anything he had ever felt before.

Only looking back did he realize it was admiration at everything that he couldn't be.

…

Jun wished he'd stayed asleep in that alley. The second he walked in the door he was slapped across the face, the scent of alcohol hitting him just as hard.

"What do you think you're doing staying out this late? You know you have school tomorrow. I'm not going to deal with the people there again because you keep missing or getting into fights. I'm so sick of you! Why can't you just be a normal kid and do what you're told!"

Jun clenched his teeth, his father grabbing him by the hair, the five or six inches of it there were.

"And of course you have to have her god damn hair. Why can't you be like her! _?_ "

His father let him go after shoving him back. Jun rubbed his head, wondering how much more abuse it was going to take. His father, unlike all those he stood up to, never raised a hand to him. At least, not a closed one. That mattered. He wished he would. He'd kill the lazy son of a bitch who got off yelling at him about school and all that non-sense when he didn't even have a job of his own.

Jun let out a breath, calming down. If his father saw him start to get angry, he'd only go off on him more. He'd learned that early on, and it was best to meet the hostility with a cool indifference.

He had to wonder why his father cared so much about his hair. His mother was Irish, though she'd been in Japan most of her life, so the odds of him having the light blond hair that she possessed after mating with his father were slim. He was glad he had it though. His mother hadn't been the best, but he appreciated her qualities more than the Japanese ones that were barely obvious in his features.

He also liked it because it made him different then the others. He hated society, its people, the other kids at school, the teachers. He hated the people who wanted to do good for some sick self-satisfaction of their own. For the most part, he hated those that did evils too. The only reason, in the end, he could somewhat stand them, was that they gave him a reason to fight- to ease his boredom with this world.

"You and your damn hair," his father repeated, wandering off in the kitchen and leaving Jun free to get to his room. He flicked the lock that had once been on the door, watching where it hung limply to the side. It had become something habitual, like a 'welcome home' to himself. He'd tried, at one time, to keep his father out of his room. The man hadn't liked that.

Unlike the rest of the house, which his father kept clean most of the time, Jun didn't care that his room had old clothes everywhere that needed washing. There were papers from school that he'd brought home likely years before, still hanging out like old ghosts.

Jun laid on his bed, unmade for the past few weeks, the sounds of plastic and who knew what else, that were stacked and fallen over the side of his bed, making noise before it settled.

Letting out a breath, he admitted to himself that he was tired with this life. He couldn't say he had it bad, but it was just so boring.

A long time ago, not necessarily because of the failure of a marriage between his mother and father, Jun had learned he didn't care for the company of women- or anyone. All those he met were better off either left to their own accord, beat, or used. That was how life worked.

Jun eyed his father's door where it was open across the way. He wondered if, maybe today, he could get into the safe.

…

Toishio stood outside. Because of the yelling he could hear even across the street, he had to guess that this was Junsuke's home. He didn't feel good leaving, even after he heard the door close and the yelling quiet down to indistinguishable noise.

He sat where he was, away from the light, watching the house. He should go home. He should. He had school. He still had to give his mom the eggs.

Yet he stayed, staring at his watch. Five minutes. Ten. Laying back, he let time pass. It was pretty warm out, and his mom wouldn't be mad if he was a bit late. He could stay at least a half an hour and make sure nothing happened.

Thirty-five minutes later Toishio jumped, a loud noise cutting through the air. He slowly crept across the street, up to the house.

That's when he started to see the smoke.

…

A few Internet videos and some tools he managed to pocket at the store and he was finally able to hold the cold steal in his hands. You weren't supposed to own a gun, Jun knew that, but being an ex-cop, his father had one stashed away in case of emergencies. He personally thought it was for the man's own ego but he didn't care if that was the real reason.

Standing, Jun looked at himself holding it in the mirror. He was smiling, though he wasn't sure why at first. It occurred to him that he had the greatest weapon in the world for bringing down all those people who were better off dead. He had wished it, wanted it, but even in the fights he had won, he hadn't dared take it too far.

After all, why should he if he could get another fight out of them?

If he weren't in his school clothes, he thought, he looked pretty cool in the mirror. He'd never wanted to be a cop but the weapon was a perk. If the police relied on them more, maybe he'd think about it.

"What do you think you're doing?!" his father demanded, staggering drunk into the room. Clearly he hadn't been any more ready than Jun was for this confrontation, the man's eyes going to the gun. "Give me that!"

There was a second of thought there. He had the power. He could do whatever he wanted right now. He turned the gun on his father, flipping the small switch at the side that kept the safety on. "No."

His father stopped but not out of fear. The man huffed, coming at him a second later.

Jun didn't think about it. He simply pulled the trigger.

There was blood, a lot more than he was expecting. Jun felt his heart race as he watched the man reach for his chest, near the center, where all the blood was coming from. The eyes looking back at him and going out of focus were confused, scared, like he'd never seen them before.

Then the man was still on the floor.

Jun felt the heavy metal of the gun in his hand, his ears still ringing from the sound it had made. There was no way that the noise had gone unnoticed. It was pretty unmistakable, though he had never heard it before.

Looking up, Jun could see into the mirror. There, he saw his mother's hair, shorter than she had ever had it, and her same blue-green eyes so unlike any Japanese persons. It wasn't so much the blood on his face that was a surprise, seeing it splashed on one of his cheeks and down his neck, spots here and there - but the smile that he wore.

Jun laughed. He laughed because that had felt so _good_. He almost wanted to do it again. The fact that his father had died so quickly was a disappointment. He would have liked to have seen him suffer just a bit more before he had put him out of the world's misery.

While he wasn't trying to excel in school, Jun had a sharp mind. The police would be here soon and, weapon or not, he'd be questioned. Who knew what they would find? While life was unbearable, a life behind bars would be worse. He didn't see that he deserved such a fate anyway.

Taking all the liquor that he could find and spilling it throughout the house, Jun got a match and watched it all start to burn as he stood in the kitchen, in the middle of the hellfire he had started. He didn't have a mirror to see the smile but he could feel it all the same.

The door, near the kitchen, slammed open and Jun felt himself going for the gun that he had slipped into the band of his pants. He'd been expecting the cops, a neighbor, a multitude of possibilities. He had not been expecting that little middle-schooler who wouldn't leave him alone.

"Junsuke-kun?" The boy looked around, terrified at the fire, likely terrified of him. He hadn't bothered to wipe off the blood. It wasn't as if the expression was new to him. The boy was always afraid.

The weird thing was, he didn't run away. Jun was stiff as Toishio ran up to him, taking his hand and slipping out of it. Jun saw the blood that was on there, probably from his father or touching something in the room. The kid didn't care much more than to wipe his own hand off before grabbing him again and trying to drag him outside.

"Come on! Hurry up before you catch on fire!"

What a stupid idea. People burned, they didn't catch on fire. Of course, his clothes could catch on fire and that would probably hurt, but he didn't know why the kid cared so much. The guy was probably getting burnt as well. It wasn't like the heat hadn't already made his eyes start to sting.

"Get out of here." Jun threw the smaller boy off easily. "Go on, get!"

"But you're just going to stay in the fire!" Toishio stomped. "And I'm not going to let you!"

Jun hadn't thought about that. Being burned alive was a new experience. Running from the police might be fun for a while as well. He didn't really want to die so he was probably going to go with that second option. He was sure the next life was going to be just as boring as his current one.

"I'm not an idiot." Jun walked out, Toishio close to his side, though he had to keep side-stepping behind him to avoid the flames. They walked out together and Jun looked up and down the street, hearing the sirens and turning to his right. He didn't know what was out that way, but it was infinitely better than anything waiting for him at that house.

"Where are you going? Did you get hurt? Do you need a doctor? What happened?"

What an annoying kid. Jun showed him the gun, slipping it back in his waistband. "I happened. I just killed someone. You better get out of here before they think you helped me or something."

Toishio stopped but in another second he found the boy running at his side to catch up, staying there.

"I told you to get out of here!"

"You're dad was mean, wasn't he? I don't know a lot about you, you don't like to talk to me, so I found some guys who used to be your friends. They said that, when you were little, your mom left your dad because he was a bad guy. Then he came back. I knew you'd just beat him up or something if he tried that again but…"

"He didn't touch me." He had, but it wasn't in any way that could leave bruise. "The man was a parasite though. He deserved this. I'm sure wherever my mother is, she's smiling too." Jun could feel it back on his face and has no issues with it.

"You were doing a good thing then. You stopped a bad guy." Toishio eyed lower, near where he had stowed the gun, and Jun made sure to keep a hand on it so the younger boy wouldn't go reaching. "I wish I could do that too. Those bullies at school would think twice before messing with us then."

That wasn't such a bad idea. It wasn't like he was going to stick around here. Jun took the gun back out, checking the clip. He hadn't picked up any ammo and wished he had. "Five bullets. Do you have names and addresses?"

Toishio shook his head. "Most bullies are just idiots. You only need one. Turn right."

Jun turned, walking with the boy, not sure who he was about to shoot but he knew that Toishio not only had a point, but was the best to decide who to make an example of. If he killed one of them, the other insects at the school would start to learn that there are some things in this world that won't be tolerated.

It was so easy, getting into the home. All he had to do was knock, ask for a name he was sure he had recognized around school, and come face to face with Kamaki-kun. While he was older than Toishio, Jun had a year on him. The boy would have been in his high school come next year, and there were already stories about the things this boy had done. The most recent he recalled was the guy taking scissors to a ten-year-old girl's hair.

A bullet for him, another for his mother, and two for his father when the man had unexpectedly dodged, and Jun was left with only one remaining as he dipped his fingers into Kamaki-kun's head wound, painting his message on the wall. "There. If the police don't announce it, I'm sure it will make its way around school when they investigate." Jun wiped off his fingers on his black pants, walking out the door with Toishio in tow.

He had to wonder how the scared, overweight kid, had just stood by him while he had done that. "Sick of being bullied, aren't you?"

Toishio nodded, lifting up part of his shirt. "That guy stabbed me with a pen. I didn't even know him. I hate people like that. Why do people have to hurt others just for the fun of it? They should all die." There was real anger there as the boy fisted his hands at his side and Jun had to smile.

"I agree, though more of the fact that life is boring the way it is. We need to change it and the police aren't doing it. Why not us?"

Toishio let out a breath and smiled up at him. For a fat kid, there was a fire of determination there. He nodded. "More than just those bullies though. There are a lot of evil grownups out there, like your dad. And the police can't touch them."

"Are you good with that? I don't know where I'm going. I have no family to go back to. You have one, don't you?"

Toishio nodded, looking back over his shoulder and walking backwards for a few steps before turning to face him. "Yeah, I do, but they can take care of themselves. My big brother right here needs some looking after. You get into way too much trouble and someone has to be there to watch out for you."

Jun laughed. Of all the things that had separated him from reality, this little tie felt nice. For once, his laugher wasn't tinged with darker intent. "Don't expect me to look out of you in return. If you do something stupid, it's your own fault."

"I know that. I'll get better. I'll be just like you." The determination was back and Jun let the boy be. Eleven wasn't exactly the age to be making decisions like this, but the world was harsh and Jun thought that, for a while at least, he'd be both making it harsher and kinder. It was something to do to end his boredom.

Both of them stopped, a woman he had never seen before walking down the street towards him, dark hat shading her eyes. That was strange, considering night had fallen a long time ago. Jun thought about the last bullet in his gun before relaxing. It wasn't as if she knew what he had just done. Toishio had insisted in wiping the blood away so they weren't caught, so nothing spoke of his actions.

The woman stopped when they were within a few feet, making Jun stop as well, Toishio behind him.

"Well now, who do we have here?"

" _Hey, Ju-ehh, what should we do?"_ The words were quiet but not quiet enough and he elbowed Toishio when he'd almost said his name. It wasn't that important but he'd rather keep the bullet if he had to.

"Gin, is it?" There was an English tint to her accent and Jun shrugged, grabbing Toishio by the jacket and walking past her. He'd leave the guy behind if he kept becoming dead weight.

"Are you sure you really want to walk away from me?"

Jun stopped and turned only he had put some distance between the two of them. "I don't know. You're a pretty strange woman." He tried to see her eyes as she turned as well, but couldn't make them out in the shadows.

Her smile was easy to see. "I think you're a rather remarkable young man, Gin-kun." She held out her hand. "How about you come with me and we change the world? That's what you wanted, isn't it?"

That wasn't necessarily what he wanted, but her knowing what they were talking about was more intriguing. Had she been following them? If she had, why had she not call the police? She'd been close enough to hear what they were talking about that there was no question that she was aware of his actions. "Who are you?"

"You can just call me Boss."


End file.
